The people around you can greatly affect your mood and self esteem. By choosing friends and partners that have a positive influence on your personality you will feel much happier and secure.

It is important for any relationship to be mutual, when one side is offering more than the other, problems can arise. Not just limited to romantic relationships, here are just a few of the relationships you should try to avoid:

1. The Friend Who Delights In Your Misery

For whatever reason, there are some people in this world who don’t want to see you happy, especially when they are not. While it might not be as obvious as them laughing ecstatically when you get dumped, you may notice they become jealous and moody when something positive happens in your life.

They cannot handle change, and they could just be scared of losing your friendship but it is not a positive relationship. For example – the friend who avoids you because you just got engaged and they are still single who becomes upset and distant simply because they are unhappy with their own life.

True friends will be happy for your success, even if you made it before them.

2. The Married Man

Dating a married man is never a good idea, no matter how attentive and adorable he is. Only a small majority of married men will leave their wives, and even if they did you could end up being cheated on yourself.

Remember there is a third party involved in this relationship, and it is best to avoid the situation right from the start so that nobody gets hurt. Dating a married man will leave you feeling jealous and alone.

3. The Man Who Won’t Commit

It is common for women to try to change a man but it is not often successful in real life. You deserve to know where you stand, and if you are looking for a long term relationship it is best to avoid those with commitment phobia.

While it might be exciting at first, you will get tired of chasing him and by then you may feel too attached to be able to walk away easily.

4. The Mummy’s Boy

Just because a man is close to his family doesn’t make him a Mummy’s Boy. A good family relationship is usually positive, especially if you will be together for the long term. However, when you feel like you are always competing with his Mother; it is time to take a good look at your partnership.

This relationship is not doomed, but you do need to share your feelings with him so that you are comfortable. You want your future mother in law in your lives, but you want her to be a spectator not an umpire.

5. The Friend Who You Cannot Trust

All kinds of relationships are based on trust. Whether it is your platonic friend who gossips behind your back or the cheating partner, these can negatively affect your self esteem. It is a horrible feeling to always feel untrusting; you should feel safe in your relationships.

Once trust has been lost it can be hard to earn back, so treat your friends and loved ones how you wish to be treated.

6. A Work Colleague

Dating work colleagues isn’t always going to end badly – in fact many successful relationships have started this way. There are complications however as you don’t want it to affect your work. Inter office dating may be against company policy, or simply it may make you less productive or professional.

If your relationship ends, will you still be able to feel comfortable working with him? If you can’t avoid an office romance, this is the time to be mature and keep your outside life away from the office. Treat him professionally during work hours and if you do decide to split, you need a plan how to deal with it at work.

7. Your Friend’s Ex

It’s not hard to see that this could lead to difficulty within your friendship particularly if they were together for a long period. When choosing to date your friends ex, just remember you could very well lose your friendship for good, and cause your friend a lot of hurt.
While there are exceptions to the rule, handle with care because it’s a delicate situation to be in.

8. The Controller

This is the most serious one to avoid, and it is not hard to understand why. You may not notice the signs of a controlling and abusive partner early on but if you do then you need to work on a plan to remove yourself from the situation. You do not deserve to be abused emotionally or physically under any circumstance.

If your partner is being abusive or you know someone who is being abused please contact a professional for help, such as Lifeline: 131114

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